


Desperation

by StateOfBazlessness



Series: 'Cause boy, you're perfect (Always worth it) [2]
Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell, Simon Snow & Related Fandoms
Genre: Aftercare, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, BDSM, Bottom Simon Snow, Come Sharing, Comeplay, Consensual Kink, Dom/sub, Dominant Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch, Explicit Consent, Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff and Smut, Kissing, Light Angst, Light BDSM, M/M, Masturbation, Neck Kissing, Nipple Licking, Nipple Play, Orgasm Control, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Orgasm Denial, Overstimulation, POV Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch, Porn with Feelings, Possessive Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch, Praise Kink, Prostate Massage, Safe Sane and Consensual, Sexual Roleplay, Simon Snow Loves Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch, Smut, Soft Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch, Strength Kink, Submissive Simon Snow, Subspace, Top Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch Loves Simon Snow, Vampire Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-09
Updated: 2021-02-09
Packaged: 2021-03-15 02:20:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,298
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29306382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StateOfBazlessness/pseuds/StateOfBazlessness
Summary: desperation (noun): the feeling that you have when you are in such a bad situation that you are willing to take risks in order to change it.Simon Snow lays sprawled on my bed on his back, stark naked, and if it's not the most beautiful sight I have ever seen I don't know what is. I'm not sure what I did to deserve this, in this life or in another.A bright red flush adorns his face, and his pleading blue eyes stare straight into my soul. His face is scrunched up a little, as if he were in physical pain."Baz, come here already. Please..." he whines adorably. I made him wait long enough, I suppose, but I just can't help it. Making him all desperate for me feels too good, it's intoxicating.
Relationships: Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch/Simon Snow
Series: 'Cause boy, you're perfect (Always worth it) [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2154942
Comments: 16
Kudos: 76





	Desperation

**Author's Note:**

> Heed the tags!

Simon Snow lays sprawled on my bed on his back, stark naked, and if it's not the most beautiful sight I have ever seen I don't know what is. I'm not sure what I did to deserve this, in this life or in another.

A bright red flush adorns his face, and his pleading blue eyes stare straight into my soul. His face is scrunched up a little, as if he were in physical pain.

"Baz, come here already. Please..." he whines adorably. I made him wait long enough, I suppose, but I just can't help it. Making him all desperate for me feels too good, it's intoxicating. 

Everything about Simon Snow is intoxicating. His body, his face, his laughter, his aliveness. Maybe that is why I'm so drawn to him. He makes me feel alive. So much more than I ever was before I turned. Sometimes he makes me forget my "predicament". 

I can't wait anymore, I must feel his soft, warm skin on my hands. I slowly make my way to him, trying to keep the desperation out of my steps and the need to just pounce him right away. Not now, even if I do that sometimes after a long, eventless day at university. No. Today is the kind of night where I want to take him apart piece by piece by my hands and put him back together. To edge him to oblivion, to make him take everything I give to him, and shower him in praises afterwards. To give him everything he deserves and wants.

I stop by the side of my bed and bask in Simon's glory. The closer I'm to him, the more he looks like something I would gladly eat. 

He stays perfectly put in his position, just as I told him. I lean in to put my right hand on his cheek, and he positively melts into the touch. I begin to caress his face slowly with my thumb.

"Good boy. You are so good for me, Simon. Doing just as I told you. So perfect." 

It was not that unbelievable that Simon has a huge praise kink, but it still took me off guard. How receptive he became to all of my honeyed words when we first made love a year ago. I took it as my life mission to indulge him and tell him everything sweet I can think of. I've been thinking about him half my life, so there is a lot to say. An endless amount of adoration to pour.

He is the Sun and he deserves the world.

He gives off a soft sigh before closing his eyes momentarily and then turning his gaze on me, silently begging me to touch him somewhere else.

I can imagine how hard it must be for him to stay this still, not being able to move his hands from his sides and touch me back. It wasn't always like this though, it's something he learned with time.

The first few times, when we started to explore our slightly more depraved desires in bed, he asked me to tie his hands behind his back because he couldn't keep them to himself.

He came a long way from that, I must admit. Became so pliant in my hands, all of his control given to me. He trusts me with this, he told me. He says I make him feel safe, and like if nothing could happen to him when he is with me. 

I would never hurt him again. Never. I'm still atoning for all the times I had hurt him before. I apologised to Simon a thousand times, both with words and deeds, but I still hate myself for it.

He trusts me, and I can't ever do something to lose his trust. 

I move my hand lower to hover over his achingly hard cock. It's a pretty pink colour and rests just under his navel. His cock is not as big as mine, but still impressively thick in its own right. Perfect, just like the rest of him.

"Baz." he pleads in a pained voice. 

I grab his prick by the shaft and move my head to mouth at his ear. His eyes close up accordingly with my sudden closeness. So cute.

"You will not come until I tell you explicitly you can. Otherwise I'll have to punish you, and I'll make sure you won't like that. Understood?" 

He nods mechanically. This won't do. I squeeze his cock a bit harder, putting some force into it. He squirms, and I know he enjoys the pressure by the expression on his face.

"I asked,"Do you understand", Snow? Use your words." I use my dominant voice that makes his pretty toes curl. 

I feel cruel, but we negotiated our kinks for a long time, and everything goes just the way he wanted. I wouldn't ever have dared to ask for kinky sex, even if that is something I dreamed of since 5th year at Watford. My teenage fantasies are all getting fulfilled. Well, not all of them. Some are just better left alone.

This is still better than anything I've fantasised of. You won't hear me complaining at all.

"Y-yes, Baz." he manages finally.

"Good." I ease my grip on his cock, and start to move my hand in slow, languid strikes. 

I start to leave kisses from his ear, all the way down. I kiss both of his pretty cheeks, then his nose, his chin and neck. I make sure to give his moles special attention. Those are my weak spots.

Whoever came up with the idea and made Simon Snow knew how to make him irresistible. No wonder I could never leave him alone back at Watford. Wherever he goes, all eyes are on him. Mine, most of all.

He is not an attention seeker, attention seeks him. 

My fangs popped the moment I came into the room and Simon's aroused scent hit my nose. The same minute my cock also went painfully hard, restrained by the confinement of my trousers.

But this is not about me right now. 

I drag my teeth carefully over the side of his neck, all the while keeping up my stroking. He bared it for me even more, a submissive gesture that makes my slow-working heart go double time. I feel like it could win a race.

"So gorgeous. All for me." I punctuate what I said by carefully biting down on his Adam's apple. The bobbing motion was way too enticing to be let go of without retaliation. 

Simon told me he is interested in me biting him. I told him he is crazy. He pouted like a scolded child. Definitely acts like one sometimes. I don't even know how this whole biting/turning thing works. It is damnation, not something which should be desired. He is just as disturbed as me. (We match.)

This is a dangerous game, but we figured after a while that if no skin is breached there is nothing to worry about. Much to Snow's joy.

He swallows down while I keep my teeth there firmly.

"All for you." he sounds so wrecked already, and I haven't even started yet.

I perk my head up, and I'm sure I'm having heart eyes. Not really a dominant look, but I can't help it when someone is as endearingly loveable as Simon. 

I lean into kiss his lips and seek entrance inside. He lets my tongue in immediately, and I explore with unmasked vigour.

My other hand, which had been unoccupied until now, moves to one of his nipples, and I pinch lightly. Simon moans into the kiss. I smirk proudly. The whole sensitivity thing makes this so much better. 

I bring my mouth to his other nipple and start licking, while keeping up the work with my hands. Simon is blushing from the tip of his ears down to his chest, and it's a breathtaking sight. And the sounds he is making...

I told him early on that he doesn't have to keep quiet when we're having sex. Everything that comes out from his pretty mouth is music to my ears. The sweetest melody. 

"Ngh… B-Baz, I'm close…" 

"But you won't come, will you? I would be so disappointed with you, Simon." I coo.

He locks his eyes with mine, giving me a panicked look. He is shuddering and tries very hard not to buck up into the hand down on his dick.

"No. I'm not allowed." 

"Good boy." I say before I bite down hard on his nipple and start sucking earnestly. He is coming apart before my eyes so visibly it makes my mouth water. 

I continue my attack on three fronts before suddenly stopping with all actions. He gives off a needy whine. I chuckle. 

"Somebody is eager, I see. Don't worry, I'm not stopping anytime soon." I say darkly.

My right hand travels down to Simon's perfect little ass, and gives it a squeeze, followed by a broken moan.

I start to get up and make my way to the bedside table to get lube. I need that for what I'm doing next.

"Baz. Where are you going? Don't leave, please. Please..." he sounds so sad. I turn back quickly and my heart breaks when I see that his eyes are even sadder and slightly watery. Role play or not, I can't stand this.

I hurry back to pull Simon into my arms and lap, embracing him tightly. He burrows into my chest, and gives off a silent sob I could only possibly sense with my vampire hearing.

"I-I'm sorry. I have been bad. I deserve punishm…" I cut him off with a kiss on his mouth. I couldn't let him finish that sentence, and let him fall deeper into a dark place.  
I don't stop with my pursuit on his lips until I feel him relax and his shoulders untense.

"Simon, you don't deserve punishment for needing reassurance. I should have told you that I'm only going to get lube from the drawer. I'm sorry." I tell him honestly.

His eyes go as wide as the cherry scone serving plates at Watford, and the perpetual blush on his face goes even darker.

"I-I... I'm sorry, I'm so stupid." he puts his head to my collarbone and starts to giggle. Simon, my Simon is back, and I can't help but grin with my chin in his soft curls.

The fact that he thinks that I'd abandon him still makes something ache deep in my chest. I couldn't live without him. I'd rather choose death than that.

"Simon, I will never let go of you. You'll always have me, until the day the Sun stops coming up in the east and setting in the west. You make me alive."

"Baz… I love you." he tries hard not to let those tears fall, but I wouldn't mind. 

"I love you too, Simon. More than anything." 

I wait a minute more and then put my hands on either side of his cheeks to make him look me in the eye. 

"Would you like to continue, love? I'd understand if you didn't." I tell him softly. 

"I do, Baz. Can we? Please." he is so damn adorable. I can't help but smile.

"Of course, Simon. Of course." 

I grab him by the waist and lift him from my lap to the bed. There is a yelp which he tries to stop unsuccessfully, much to my enjoyment. He loves my vampire strength, that's a Simon Snow fact. (I want to believe that after nearly 10 years of living together I know everything about him.) 

I get the sour cherry scented lube (he insisted) from the bedside drawer and then move back to kneel at his butt. He is looking at me so expectantly, like if I was his saviour. 

I give him a smirk I perfected over the years and he gulps audibly. I lube three of my fingers and spread his cheeks. 

"What do you want, Simon?" I want to hear him beg for it, just a little more before I fuck him deep with my fingers. He makes a sound deep in his throat that makes my clothed cock twitch.

"Please… just do something. Fill me up, I need to feel you. Baz…"

I move my thumb to circle his rim with precise waves. I stop abruptly and he gives out a choked moan.

"Whose hole is this?" 

"Yours. Only yours." 

"That's right." I slap one of his cheeks with little force. "Such a good boy. And good boys like you deserve treats."

I take pity on him and move one of my fingers in his blessed heat easily. I sense the tremor going through his body, how much he anticipated this moment when I'm finally inside him. There is no place I'd rather be than in him.

I start to move my finger in and out his hole while my other hand kneads at his perk cheeks mindlessly. So plush and filled all in the right places. I swear our silk pillows are not this soft.

I deliberately start to arch my finger, looking for that spot which makes the boy made of stars see stars. For him to meet his celestial brethren, as if he were in heaven, a place worthy of him. 

I'd descend to hell a thousand times over for Simon to go there in the end.

I find the little bump of nerves and prod at it with a deft finger. Simon's whole body starts to shudder while moaning pitifully, and I lean in to leave open mouthed kisses on his thighs. 

"So beautiful." I mutter softly and continue. "Out of this world beauty. Nothing comes to the way I see you." I keep up the relentless assault on his prostate while my other hand starts to fondle his balls. I give them a controlled squeeze. I look up to see his eyes roll back into his head and lashes flutter. "Nothing."

One more finger enters him, and I make his hole stretch with my enthusiastic scissoring.  
Two fingers massaging his sweet spot is better than one after all.

Snow's moans start to sound breathless, and I know his resolve is close to breaking. I enjoy his sweet torture way too much, but in the end, he is the one in control. One word from his mouth and everything stops. I would never force anything on him he doesn't want. 

After I add the third finger to assault his tight little hole, his endless blue eyes start to well up. 

"Nghh. Bazzzzz…" 

"What, Snow?" I rarely ever use his middle name to rile him up anymore, but it's a good choice of weapon tearing Simon Snow utterly apart.

He gives me those big doe-eyes, as if he were just an innocent prey. I'm the predator then, I suppose. I smirk open-mouthed to show him my fangs. 

"Fuck me with your c-cock, please. I can't t-take this anymore." 

I level him with a dangerous look, and he looks like he wants to hide. 

"You take everything that I give to you. I'll fuck you when I deem you ready for my cock. Beg for it." I say this all the while shoving three fingers in and out his hole, and my thumb is circling the rim. 

"P-please, Baz. Please, I'd do anything to feel you inside me. I'll be good, just… please." he pleads so brokenly I finally give in. I surge forward to capture his mouth in a searing kiss. 

"As you wish, sweetheart." 

I free my imprisoned prick, and move my pants down. It bounces a bit, then stops facing straight at the sky. I'm as hard as ever.

The first time we had penetrative sex, I could feel Simon being scared of my size, even if he didn't admit it with words, the brave git. I told him we can do it the other way around, but he was keen on feeling me inside of him. What can I say, I'm well-endowed in the department. I'm not sure whether the vampire genes have anything to do with it.

I move so on the bed that my cock is at his rim, and I can feel his well-stretched hole twitch.

"Ready, love?" 

"Yes, Baz. Please." 

I make my way into the heat. Despite being stretched by three fingers, Simon is still as tight as ever inside. And so warm. Everything about him is warm, but inside is by far the best. 

I slowly make my way forward, inch by inch. I always go slow at first to make the intrusion as painless as possible. I'll have time to go rough later anyway.

I bottom out, my balls dangling at his cheeks, and I see a blissed expression on his face.

"Okay, sweetheart?" 

"Yes… move please." 

"Oh, I will." I smirk smugly, then take my dick out to slam it back in with a rapid motion. 

I leave one hand by his prick, and move the other to his right nipple to play with it. My mouth is on the other, licking the soft bud, all the while thrusting in and out his silky heat.

I want to overwhelm him and cry out for release.

I keep this up for a few minutes, until he feels ready to burst.

"Baz…I'm so close. C-can I come?" 

I harden the grip on the base of his cock. He cries out with a choked sob.

"No, Snow. You won't come until I tell you you can. You can only come after I release my load deep inside you, and you'll be thankful for my seed. If you come before me, I won't let you for a whole week. Do you want that?" I feel nefarious, but the way his dick seems to harden even more conveys that he wouldn't really mind. What did I do to deserve this man?

He shakes his head and some tears run loose from his eyes. I won't go as hard to make him say it out loud in his fucked out state. I'm a sadist, but not that much.

"Good boy." I say and then start slamming my dick to the spot where I know his prostate is. I take my cock out until only the tip is in, and set a brutal pace, chasing my own release. I have to cum so he can come, too. He deserves it so much.

I feel closer to release with every thrust, and I move my head to mouth at his bare throat. It's slightly salty from some tears reaching it, and the taste which is only Simon. Better than the nectar of the Olympian gods.

I bury myself to the hilt one last time and come deep inside him. I feel an electric shock going all through my body. Every time feels like the first time with Simon. I pant at his throat, then I reach up to whisper in his ear. 

His salvation. One simple word.

"Come." 

And come he does in a very Simon Snow way. He arches his back like a cat stretching, his mouth half-way open so I can see his pearly white front teeth. His orgasm is soundless. I think his throat is too tired from all the sounds he made for me. I smile privately. I did my job well then.

His dick shots high up his stomach and chest multiple times. I can see his balls emptying their content, and that makes me salivate. 

Once he is finished, he looks close to passing out from the bliss and searches for my eyes. 

"Gorgeous." 

I start to lap up the cum from his body with my hand and move my fingers up to his mouth.

"Open up." I command.

He swallows then proceeds to do as I told him. I move two fingers inside.

"Suck. Keep it in your mouth, don't swallow."

I do this until he cleans himself indirectly with the help of my fingers.

I'm still deep in his hole down there, my cock softened only a little, and the way he is kitten licking my hand I can feel it harden once again. It's the vampire stamina, I learned. Based on 5th year wanking experiences, I can't really go fully dry, as if my balls were always full.

I wonder how many times I could come inside Simon in a streak. We have to try that out sometime. The closest was two times once, but he was so exhausted by the end I let the urge to fuck into him until dawn go. 

I make sure to touch his overstimulated prostate while I'm dragging my dick out. He closes his eyes and whines softly.

Once it's out I reach down to move my fingers in the gape it left in its wake. I could shove in 4 of my fingers easily, but I'm merciful. I scissor the golden boy just a little bit more to tease him and start gathering my seed.

I'm careful not to let any of it flow out, even if the sight of that is something I could never get enough of. 

My fingers travel up to his mouth and he opens up with big, lustful eyes instinctively.

"Do you like the taste of my seed mixed with your own?" 

He bobs his head up and down adorably all the while staring into my eyes and licking my fingers. He is so enthralled, even if I never used my vampire mind control on him. 

Once his hole is mostly cleaned of my cum, I go and shove my tongue in his mouth. I can taste both of our seeds on his own tongue. Mine is more bitter, while his is sweet. Of course it is like that.

I stop kissing, and let my dominant role go.

"I love you, Simon. You are perfect. The best thing that ever happened to me. Worth more than anything." I tell him everything I feel all the while peppering his cheeks, his nose, his chin with soft kisses. 

He looks at me with a kind of adoration I can only wish to achieve while looking at him. He climbs into my lap, and snakes his arms around my neck. He plays with the hair by the nape of my neck, and I close my eyes to the blessed feeling.

"I love you, Baz. You are everything I want and more. Thank you, for this." 

Any sadness or lust is gone in his eyes and tone, and he seems as happy as ever. The thought warms my cold heart.

"You're welcome love." I beam back at him to reassure that he is everything I want, too.

We make out softly for a few more minutes, but we really need to shower. Even if most of the fruit of our lovemaking is gone, it'll still feel gross tomorrow morning. 

I sit up and start carrying him bridal style to the bathroom. He yelps and burrows into my chest like a sleepy cat. I know how tired he gets after sex.

I open the bathroom door carefully and start to fill the tub with warm water. I keep Simon tightly in my arms until it's halfway full, then put him down in the water. He splashes at the water tiredly like a child. I chuckle.

"What, you prick? Are you coming in, or just keep staring?" Ah. There he is. Fresh out of subspace, talking big as ever.

I lean into the tub to touch his cheek.

"I wouldn't mind staring at you until the end of times." I let him know honestly.

He blushes then dives his head in the water until it reaches his nose.

I grin smugly, then make my way to move in the tub behind him. I hug Simon close to my chest in a strong grip. He sighs and relaxes into my touch.

Even if he doesn't really need me washing him, I still like to do it. I like to do everything when he is concerned. Add Simon Snow to the equitation, and I'm good to go.

I wash his chest, his arms, shoulders, back and then his hair with my shampoo. Cedar and bergamot. He loves the smell so much that when we are apart for some reason he only wears my clothes because they smell like me. (I do the same.)

On one particular tug on his hair, he moans loudly. I see the tip of his ears turning pink.

"We could always go another round, you know." I whisper roughly.

He shivers then turns around to face me.

"Absolutely not. I have classes in the morning. Not everyone can sleep in like you, y'know?" he finishes with a yawn. Then his expression changes, and his mouth turns up in a half smile. "Another time." 

"I will take you up on that." 

He rolls his eyes.

"I know."

We kiss for a little more, then I get him dry with a soft towel. He protests weakly when I snatch him up again like he weighs nothing, but he is too tired to do anything about it.

I put Simon down in the bed. He nests and burrows around in the blankets, and makes grabby hands for me to follow him. 

I settle at his back, spooning him from behind. I nose at his nape contentedly, smelling the mix of Simon and my shampoo. My hands are by his stomach, and he puts his there as well.

Before I could fall asleep to sweet dreams, I hear him whisper four little words in a sleepy tone.

"I love you, Baz." 

"I love you, Simon." 

I dream of golden curls and freckled skin.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments are appreciated! :)


End file.
